i saw the cutest little chihuahua mix (w/jack russell?) shivering against the back door of a trailer by the mailbox. i wanted to take him home so bad, but i had to go to work. so i decided if he was still there when i came home, i'd take him in. but he wasn't, and i was both sad and relieved. he had a collar--i hope he found his way home.

my manifestation of millionnaire-ism is going horrible. not one single person has sent me a dollar. i so want to just adopt critters and write.

the more i see of the news, the more grateful i am for my job. they're projecting 10% unemployment by the beginning of next year. and all the stories about people being foreclosed on their homes. i think the sweet little mexican guy across the way and his family got evicted. they were having major financial hard times. i have financial hard times, but i own my trailer, and i have enough to make my lot rent. walmart started me at a good wage, i (soon will) have health insurance, they have a retirement plan, and i like it. i still want to teach, but only first grade, and now i can hold out for as long as i need to.

i've still got issues with energy and the schedule, but i guess i'm just going to have to accept that this is the way my life is for now. i might just have to stay up all night if that's when i have the energy to write and work on my websites. it's not working to try to get things done before i go to work. i get upset because i wake up so late. i'm just going to have to figure out how to live with the hours. i don't want to just succumb to the depression. this isn't what i want my life to be, but only i can make it different, so i have to learn to work with what time i have.

the pain has gotten so much better! my arms don't wake me up at night anymore at all (thank you god!), and my hands are improving. they're still not very cooperative in the mornings, but i have these therapy gloves i ordered from this company in australia, and i wear them at night, and at least i don't wake up with claws i have to soak in warm water and pry open. and when i listen to the horror stories the cashiers tell in the breakroom, and the people from other departments talking about people shoplifting right under their noses and they can't do anything about it, i count myself lucky to be in dairy. besides, the exercise is fantastic. i started off in 36's that were snug--i'm now in 34's that are loose.

all in all, life is pretty good. now if people will just start sending money...